I’m currently in Vero Beach, Florida attending the Discover LOVE destination wedding planning event hosted by Indian River County.  Last night I had a wonderful evening, meeting several planners I have never met before and talking shop.  There’s a great, refreshing vibe going on and several of us spoke candidly all evening about the various challenges we are facing in our businesses.  I so appreciate the honesty I’ve experienced so far – transparency wins with me every time.

On thing I love about meeting fellow planners is the passion we have for what we do.  I have yet to meet a planner who is not excited about her work.  I also love that every planner has a particular area of focus or an additional “project” that she is working on in addition to planning and coordination.  I believe we are that way because we are constantly fueled by using our creative brain.  I really get excited to hear what another planner is doing in their city.  Planners are some of the most creative business women, and are incredibly resourceful.

I shared last night and I don’t mind sharing here that my business is not what I had hoped for this year.  In fact, I started 2010 with only one wedding on the calendar that by February was cancelled.  I felt like a complete failure.  It seemed everyone around me had clients out the wazoo.  I couldn’t understand what I was doing wrong, or how some people have more business than they can handle while others are acting desperately to get new business.  I’ve done a lot of soul searching this year and one thing I finally realized is that I CANNOT compare myself to others.  So what if ABC Weddings has 27 clients for 2010?  I don’t even want that many clients, so why do I feel jealous that they do?  It’s ridiculous, really, and it was bringing me down.

I’m happy to say things are picking up.  More than I’d imagine that they would, in fact – and it’s happening very quickly.  There is no rhyme or reason to the sudden activity, as far as I can tell.  I didn’t cut my prices, didn’t increase my blog activity, in fact I didn’t do anything except keep plugging along.  I resolved to still be here, to still be standing when the economy takes a turn for the better, and I resolved to “outlive” the newbie’s on the scene.  My recent clients came to me from different avenues, one from a caterer, one through a soon to be summer intern, one from a past wedding, etc.  This literally happened over the course of a couple of days.  I told my husband I felt as though it was raining blessings directly down on me – finally.  I can only attribute it to answered prayers and the fact that I consistently worked by business, even when there were no clients to work on.

During the soul searching process, I did a lot of thinking.  I reflected back on the early stages of my business.  I wanted to grow, grow, grow.  How many weddings could I feasibly do in one year?  Every day I was calculating new figures for possible income goals.  I made a lot of mistakes, including targeting the wrong market, taking out advertising I couldn’t really afford in order to reach the wrong market (it didn’t work), hiring staff to work with clients so that I could pursue new business, etc.  The recession has made me see things very differently, and I’m honestly very grateful for it.  I now have very clear ideas of what success means to me.  I’m a better business woman for having to work through this difficult time.  It has made me more intentional.

Today, success to me does not have a hard and fast dollar amount associated with it.  Success for me is doing about 10 weddings a year, with a good mix of month of and full service planning and coordination options.  Success to me means there is time in my day to be a good mom and prepare a meal for my family on most nights.  Success means that I take the time to call a friend and catch up because wow, I really miss her and I want her to know it – and besides, I actually have a half an hour to spare!  Success to me means taking off the month of July to spend time with my son and taking December off to savor and enjoy the Christmas Holiday and really connect with the people that I love.  Success to me means having time to pursue my other projects such as writing for The Stylish Planner and consulting with venues on how to better generate wedding business.  I actually feel more successful now than I did when the calendar was full – I was chasing unrealistic goals.

I think we could all benefit from defining our own success instead of comparing ourselves to others.  Don’t allow the goals of others define your business goals.  Success is different to every person and just because your goals may seem smaller than the next planner’s goals, it doesn’t mean you aren’t successful.  Are you fulfilled?  Are you passionate about what you do?  Then you’re successful. Don’t forget that.

Tell me what success means to you.  I’d love to hear about your business!